Sometime between my 11 months of Mabel post and today, the little Miss has become quite the mover.
And I’m going to be honest with you. It has rocked my world.
It’s not like I didn’t see it coming, it’s just that, it has been 5 years since I had a little baby that was crawling around and finding every speck of dirt, dust, and whatever else might be living on the floor and putting it straight into the mouth to eat/gag/choke on. (And let’s not forget to mention now that this time around there are scissors and barbie shoes and heaven knows what else laying around that she might get into)
I feel like we had a *trying* transition to a family of four on the Abigail side of things(which I’m going to be writing about again later this week!) but Mabel has always just blended into our family so seamlessly. She just showed up smiling, wonderful, and laid back and I’ve just happily toted her anywhere and everywhere with me. I feel so lucky for the last year to have been able to keep up with my regular routine for the most part. I’ve had a baby I could wear, or keep nearby, who was content to play and content to sleep. I didn’t have to miss out on things and I didn’t feel like I was falling behind.
But, that’s not the case anymore.
When your husband comes home from work and has mentioned multiple times in various ways things like, “You look like you need a battery recharge” or, “looks like the girls are winning the war today” you start to realize that things are maybe a bit different than they had been.
I feel like I’m swimming upstream. Like I’m constantly working but not actually going anywhere. I mentioned to Jim the other day that he needs to lower his expectations on….life, in general from me right now, because our littlest has suddenly sky rocketed in needs/time/attention and everything else is just going to have to wait. Of course, he was 100% fine and understanding about it- but, now that I’m remembering that conversation, as I told him those things, I think I was really saying them to myself.
I like to have things orderly and put together. I like our routine. And they’ve all been shaken up in the last month. So, I’m hard at work over here trying to readjust my routine, my priorities, my attitude, and my expectations. I have so many things that I want to do and so many things that can’t be done…..right now.
I swear to y’all, it seems like all I do all day is feed people. I’m still nursing around the clock but now Mabel is big enough for snacks and three meals. And of course there is Abigail who needs three meals and three snacks and none of them ever coincide at the same time and as soon as I feed one I’m feeding the other and then I’m cleaning up after it(BECAUSE ANTS) and then someone else is ready to eat again.
All I can do is keep my house “picked up” because I don’t have the time to actually get around to cleaning it. By the time I get it picked up so that I can actually clean it….time is up.
I have about one hour or so of an afternoon to myself and that is spent sitting in my yellow chair trying to catch up on social media/blogs/emails…and then someone is awake and SPOILER ALERT ready to eat again.
I’ve seen some amazing mama’s mention that they get up at the butt crack of dawn to get things done before their kids wake up, but let me tell you this about myself, that is NEVER going to happen over here. The earliest I’m getting up is the earliest the first kid wakes up.
Other mama’s get a lot of work done at night, which, also awesome and typically what I do as well- BUT, my number one love language is quality time. And that nightly bag of popcorn and episode or two of our show is an absolute must must must for me. I can’t spend time doing anything else but sitting on the couch with my husband once my kiddos are in bed.
So, that leaves me with the occasional random opportunity to pop in here and say hello! I have so many things I want to write and share and say. I have so many ideas. Uh, hello amazing house projects that Jim has been working like crazy on- those bad boys need someone documenting them!
I suppose, in the spirit on “keeping it real”, I have to let you know, that recently, I’ve been feeling overwhelmed. Not in a negative way, just in a “wow, these little people require a lot out of me right now” sort of way. Up until recently, I’ve been able to manage regular Courtney along with Mama Courtney- but, I think, at least for a little bit, I’m going to have to just be Mama Courtney for a while. And I’m busy working out the kinks!
I hope this doesn’t sound like I’m complaining- maybe I am- but I’m certainly not intending to. I know that none of the stuff that I listed about not getting done *really* matters, but I had been able to manage it up until recently. So, that’s mostly what this post is about. A new stage…until another new one crops up!
I think everyone goes through this- as they add new members to their families- I just think we all hit it at different times. Some during the newborn phase, some when mobility starts, some around a first birthday.
If you have any experience or advice, I’d love to talk more with you!